Healing from relationship wounds can be really difficult especially when we spend time ruminating the different scenarios of how things played out in the relationship or beating ourselves up for staying in the relationship for too long. This keeps us trapped in an emotional turmoil. But it isn’t just an emotional storm; it reverberates through our bodies, influences our future relationships, and often leaves us feeling lost.
You may have tried many different ways to heal but find yourself still being triggered from previous wounds. This is because our trauma and wounding is a full human experience, but often we only address one or two aspects of it. When we understand how our whole being is being affected emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually, then we can truly recover and heal. In this blog we will address all 4 aspects of the human experience and give you some actionable steps you can instantly apply to start healing from relationship wounds.
Emotional
Emotions are often stored long after the traumatising event. Not only that, often these emotions have been accumulated from a young age or even passed down from previous generations.
Emotions are like building blocks, they keep building on every time another significant event happens that reinforces that emotion. Emotions are meant to be felt and then released but the reason why we continuously hold onto these emotions are because we often judge ourselves and hold onto it.
If you want to release the emotion, it first starts with awareness of the root cause, then acceptance and showing yourself compassion to moving away from self judgment.
Physical
Do you remember the last time you felt anxious and your stomach started to churn? Or when you felt betrayed and your heart started to ache?
Emotions, especially during a breakup, aren’t confined to the mind; they take up residence in our bodies. Healing from relationship wounds is not just emotional, but also physical. There was a study conducted by the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA), have shown a strong correlation between emotional trauma and physical health. The brain’s response to emotional pain activates regions associated with physical pain.
When dealing with heartbreak, the body undergoes a cascade of responses. Stress hormones like cortisol flood the system, impacting various bodily functions. These emotions often manifest physically—tension in muscles, a heavy chest, or knots in the stomach.
Studies indicate that emotions can linger within the body for extended periods, contributing to chronic stress if not addressed. The unresolved emotional distress can affect sleep, digestion, and overall well-being, becoming a burden that’s carried until released.
Moving our bodies can help us release stored tension in the body. This is why going to the gym, yoga, dancing and other forms of movement are recommended. If you’re struggling to get yourself out of bed, and your mind is consumed by your breakup, make it a habit to start incorporating an exercise routine.
Mental
Healing from relationship wounds mentally from a breakup involves acknowledging and addressing the thoughts and beliefs tied to the experience and reshaping your perspectives about it.
Our mental programming is conditioned throughout our lives, and it’s striking that 95% of our behaviors are controlled by our subconscious mind, leaving only 5% within the grasp of our conscious control. Consequently, achieving what we consciously desire can be an uphill struggle. Therefore, to genuinely heal and redirect our behaviors moving forward, we need to rewire the subconscious mind.
Do you often find yourself caught in a loop of rumination? Perhaps you’re constantly replaying different scenarios from the relationship or dwelling on how the breakup unfolded. To break free from this cycle, it’s essential to challenge these limiting thought patterns. This entails confronting the beliefs that anchor these recurring thoughts and actively restructuring them.
Spiritual
Breakups can create spiritual wounds. Healing from relationship wounds spiritually can affect our sense of self, purpose, and connection to others and the world beyond ourselves. This trauma can manifest as feelings of disconnection, loss of meaning, lost of faith or a shaken belief in love, relationships and the world.
One way to reconnect spiritually is to immerse in nature as it serves as a powerful healer for the spiritual wounds inflicted by a breakup. It allows for a deep sense of connection with the world beyond yourself, offering a reminder of the vastness beyond personal struggles. You start to see that your story is a small part of a bigger picture that is being orchestrated for the greater good. This allows you to surrender your worries and hurt, knowing that even in the unknown, you are okay.
As you continue on your journey in healing from relationship wounds, know that you must address your full human experience for complete transformation. I’ve created a free training to help guide you deeper on your journey here.
